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RE: Defraying The High Cost Of Funny Business vs. 700 Editorial Words
FROM: MEINERS, TERRY A
TO: Joe O'Bryan
From: Joe O'Bryan
Sent: Monday, July 01, 2013 10:28 PM
Cc: Jack Conway; John Boel; Jim Brooks; email@example.com; Vickie Dortch; firstname.lastname@example.org; Dawn Gee; email@example.com; firstname.lastname@example.org; Shawn Johnson; email@example.com; firstname.lastname@example.org; Eric King; Jeff Lear; email@example.com; Zarantonello; firstname.lastname@example.org; email@example.com; MEINERS, TERRY A; Donna Molyneaux; firstname.lastname@example.org; Brother Goodlett; Nancy Kennedy; email@example.com; Scott Reynolds; Augustine; Sister Mary Schmuck; firstname.lastname@example.org; Doug Proffit; email@example.com; firstname.lastname@example.org; Adam Walser; Jim Waters; Assign At WHAS11
Subject: Defraying The High Cost Of Funny Business vs. 700 Editorial Words
ATTN: COUNTY CLERK
As part of my investigation into Censorship and my missing Election Officer Sheriff's Reports, I contacted the Feds to see if I couldn't get some contestant tickets, for some of us, to maybe get onto a new kinda' Government TV Reality Show.
You know...how 'bout we take a summer-time break from all this political bickering and in-fighting...maybe go spend some time with 'Big Brother'? We could relax...picnic...strip down to our skivvies...maybe visit ourselves a Holiday Water-Boardin' Theme Park, somewhere, or sumpin'?
Wouldn't that be lots and lots of fun?
According to the FCC contest rules, this Summer, they might be willing to publicly hear, and air, a seriously comedic grievance, or two, against this 1.8 billion dollar Mass Media Monster...uh...WHAS-TV-News-Radio, Courier-Journal, et al...if, a comic like me just submits an affidavit, or two.
Remember Citizens: Enter early and often. Many may enter. Few will win. Actual winnings may vary. Contest rules subject to change. Must be 18 years or older to play.
It's pretty simple.
To perform a stand-up comedy routine before a Nationally tuned-in Audience...mebbe' even...The President of the United States...concerning the seriousness of Censorship here in Kentucky, all I had to do was send a certified courtesy copy of the affidavit to them...WHAS-TV...letting them know that in order to nail a few hides to the wall down here in Bardstown, I'm going to have to start by "Rant"-ing...'jes a little bit...up there in Louisville, in their general direction.
No offense intended.
It's a bank shot...but a valid bank shot. They's guilty.
I'll bet Doug Proffit just wishes he'd posted some of my earlier emails...but, I reckon postin' jes' goes agin' the General Nature...of Political Censorship.
...and if the FCC themselves receive an original copy, two file copies, and confirmation proof that I've provided WHAS-TV with a said courtesy copy...in their Washington DC office, before the close of business day, July 1, 2013...TODAY!...I could win a free chance to testify before some kind of FCC Anti-Censorship Sub-committee...while you, my adoring Public...get to watch!
I'm beddin' down tonight...dreamin' about it.
I'd get to do the whole doggone un-cut, un-censored, un-edited comedy routine...'So Help Me God'...squealin' like a pig all the way...about what I personally know about mass media censorship and the myth of open, honest, transparent government, in Kentucky...as squeal't...straight outta' the mouth of a sworn 10+ year veteran State Election Officer.
...and, if'n you take a hard look at the affidavit copy I've left below...or ask WLKY-TV, WDRB-TV, or WAVE-TV3 altogether...they can ALL tell ya'...I've started squealin' like a pig to the Feds a bunch...already...on everybody!
Frankly, in this day and time, I'd be surprised if 'bout 4 differn't competing Multi-Billion-Dollar TV Station Managers, operatin' outta' The Greater Louisville area and wearing dark Gucci sun-glasses, hadn't done gotten mobbed-up tighter'n Tony Soprano...and have already placed 'Good Morning...WAKE UP!!!' calls to Publisher Sizemore, on her private tele, offerin' to take the old girl out for a lovely afternoon stretch-limo ride, all expenses paid, somewhere out over your more-remote, if not scenic, Corn Bread Mafia territory, here in the Tri-county Area, in order to...you know...uh..."discuss strategy"...and things.
'Cause o' her...I'm ready to start playin' FCC SmackDown in Kentucky...against the whole doggone lot of 'em...Today!
But here's the rub.
Let's not all get too excited about Samson takin' down Goliath, as bein' a fer' real sure thing...just yet.
I didn't fire off this noise-makin', Two-Day Express, Federal Emergency Freedom Flare...until Friday morning...one Tinymite Charge from a politically disgruntled poll-worker...secreted into the U.S. Mail...Barack Obama Bound outta' Bardstown...postmarked by 10:00am.
And today, if the airmail man is on time, the entire District of Columbia lights up and becomes a "hard target" for the delivery zone. The package hits the ground running and makes it to The Feds...Justice...In The Nick Of Time.
But, on the other hand, if the Postal Service fails to make delivery, by the close of Federal Business today, this could wind up being a Golden Opportunity Missed...lost...due to a bureaucratic timing technicality.
So...I guess, our collective Fates, pretty much, are in the hands of the U.S. Postal Service.
(Tell ME I don't have a sense of humor...What a nail-biter! - The Kentucky Humorist)
My only reason for informing you, County Clerk Filiatreau, of all these details, was to make sure you're aware...keep some your social calendar free, between now and August 31st, I think, for possible government hearings.
Don't worry Elaine. I've interrogated you before. You'll play to the audience, so well...in the viral videos.
And in closing, I'd like to take my best shot at adding just a little more insult-to-injury, by recovering some of my expenses...whether the FCC hears me, or not.
Since I began my Investigation, a couple of years ago back, I've racked up nearly 'bout $25 worth of receipts for photo-copies, certified stamps, printer ink and such...have you checked the prices on paper clips and rubber bands lately?...sheesh!...never meant to be so overzealous in my flagrant expenditures...but we're all living in Richie Farmer Times.
I figger The State is beholdin' to me, so far...a figger somewhere's in the amount of $24.78.
Do I hold onto my receipts and write 'em off on next year's taxes? Or can a po' homeless poll-worker find monetary reimbursement directly from the Election Board, on a month to month accounting basis?
Just askin'. Whichever way you wanna' do it.
PETITION TO DENY TV LICENSING RENEWAL
AFFIDAVIT OF JOSEPH ALLEN O'BRYAN, JR.
ELECTION OFFICER SHERIFF
COMMONWEALTH OF KENTUCKY
I, Joe O'Bryan, swear or affirm:
1. That WHAS-TV has failed to serve in the best interests of the public, by withholding any media disclosure of my newspaper censorship, by the President of the Kentucky Press Association...a fact that can be proven by simple email review.
2. That WHAS-TV is merely a “Target of Opportunity” for the beginning of your investigation. While certainly being guilty of promoting less than “Transparent Government”, their Public Relations department will be quick to point out that other Louisville area stations have chosen to follow their lead...WLKY-32, WDRB-41, WAVE TV3, have all been aware as of late August 2010, but, it's still a secret to the general public.
Come on down to Bardstown Kentucky...Home of Stephen Foster...and, nationally known as “America's Most Beautiful Small Home Town”...and investigate some malfunctioning communications pipelines. The Corn-Brained Conspiracy To Silence. This story's got it all. Shady politicians, Yellow Journalism. U-Pick the social media...TV, Radio, Internet. Everything an FCC Boogey Man...or Woman...should find fairly interesting.
First, I got censored by the Publisher of The Kentucky Standard, the town newspaper, for following the President's orders...that's President Obama's orders, that I'm speaking of. Remember? In a JFK moment he called out for the best and the brightest to speak up, to guide America towards a better course, to let our voices be heard.
In 2007, '08, and '09, I published editorials in my town's newspaper...here in current “CORNBREAD MAFIA” territory, expressing the need for a Marijuana Reform Vote in order to end some of the abhorrent corruption. Just one essay per year...'bout 650 words. But a new editorial board and a new publisher in 2010 put a stop to all of that.
I'd informed a variety of hillbilly political figures, here in this State. But they [mostly] failed to respond. So, as an Election Officer, I cited this publisher on my “Official Election Officer Sheriff's Report”...a document so sacred that it must be signed and dated and turned in every Election Day eve, even if it's left blank. But I never heard anything back.
So, next Election Officer's meeting, I inquired...the County Clerk gave me a verbal [whispered] reprimand, telling me that I knew I 'wasn't supposed to write THAT!'...and then, very next Election Day, the Attorney General's Man visited me at my precinct...took down my name and number and barked out that I 'wasn't supposed to write THAT!'...and when I asked either one or both of them to prove it, show me in writing where it says I'm not supposed to report that a sworn officer of this State is being politically censored, on my Sheriff's Report, and I'll say 'Uncle'...but until then.
She balked...and the Attorney General's Mystery Man is now MIA.
Now, I have doubts that my report ever left Bardstown. I think it got snuffed and have requested, repeatedly, under the Freedom of Information Act, to find out what paperwork made it into the Government's files...but nothing seems to be happening. Everybody's playing Hear No Evil, Speak No Evil...if'n you know what I mean.
Unfortunately, I correctly filed a formal written report and I [still] expect a formal written reply.
I contacted the Secretary of State, via the State's new high tech website...'cause nobody, to this day, will provide this Election Officer with the direct email address of that State Board of Elections Officer's Supervisor.
It's called...'culpable deniability'.
Anyway, their website accepted my submission and assured me that someone would read it...but...I never heard nothin'.
I've been pretty patient, but being told to “Hush!” from a [near] octogenarian County Clerk, with that being followed up by a visit from Special Agent Numb Nuts with the Attorney General's Office, anonymously confirming that I must “HUSH!”...ain't gonna' cut it! So, now I'm attempting to enlist Federal Forces in order to get some action.
Further Affiant saith not.
I SWEAR OR AFFIRM THAT THE ABOVE AND FOREGOING REPRESENTATIONS ARE TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE BEST OF MY INFORMATION, KNOWLEDGE, AND BELIEF.
Signed:_____________________________________ Dated: June____, 2013
STATE OF KENTUCKY
COUNTY OF NELSON
I, the undersigned Notary Public, do hereby affirm that Joseph Allen O'Bryan, Jr. personally appeared before me on the ___ day of June 2013, and signed the above Affidavit as his free and voluntary act and deed.